HOW I ACTUALLY LEARNED SOME GOOD STUFF WHILE PLAYING SOLDIER FOR A WEEK

A Special Edition of The Politics1 Report
May 10, 2001

by Ron Gunzburger
Publisher, Politics1.com

The Department of Defense calls it the "Joint Civilian Orientation Conference" (JCOC) -- but I think of it as more of a military fantasy camp for civilians. Envision some aging accountant shelling out big bucks to spend a week shagging fly balls from has-been baseball stars. Now substitute soldiers for the ball players, weapons for the baseballs -- throw in some cool explosions and lots of travel -- and you'll get the idea. For a little over week in April, I and 54 other rather lucky civilians participated in JCOC-64.

Why us? We were each nominated last year by a base commander, someone with senior DOD ties, a past JCOC participant, etc., and then selected by the Secretary of Defense from a pool of over 400 nominees. The JCOC participants -- each fairly successful in their field -- included a balance of men and women from business, government, academia and the media. The reason: DOD wants each of us to return home talking and writing about the things we observed (which, DOD hopes, will largely be positive).

Well, after paying our $2,000 apiece (for "costs") -- and hearing an endless stream of submarine collision jokes (i.e., "Try not to hit any fishing trawlers!") from friends who each thought they were the first one to think of this witticism -- it was finally time for our trip!

Stuff We Did:
Welcome speeches and orientation. We were arbitrarily divided into five groups -- Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard -- to break us into more manageable clusters for the week (and gave each group its own military escort from the designated service branch). I was assigned to the Marines (pictured right). We were also given a very detailed schedule for the week (i.e., each "Comfort Break" during the week was noted on the schedule). At the evening reception and dinner, we had a chance to chat with various high-ranking military officials and meet many of our fellow JCOC folks. I mistakenly made a sarcastic remark about President Bush's recent arsenic-in-drinking-water decision -- oblivious to the fact that one of the people I was chatting with was Bush's Acting Air Force Secretary.

Stuff We Did:
PENTAGON: The morning visit to the Pentagon seemed to be the classroom component of the trip. After a brief tour of a few corridors in the massive building, we regrouped in the pressroom for a Q&A discussion with Air Force General Dick Myers, the Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. Our next speaker was Assistant Defense Secretary Charlie Cragin, a GOP politician from Maine in his past life. Cragin served at DOD as a "Schedule C" (political appointee) during Bush I ... but was brought back to DOD in Clinton II when Senator Bill Cohen (R-ME) was appointed Defense Secretary. A Pentagon official helpfully volunteered that Cragin had been Cohen's divorce attorney back in Maine. Cragin was subsequently promoted within DOD during Bush II. Cragin told us his biggest fear is not a conventional war but some terrorist using a silent biological/toxic weapon like anthrax against a huge crowd of spectators at some sporting event: people will all go home, within a few days they'll feel like they have the flu, doctor's will agree they have the flu, and a few days later they'll die ... and by the time we realize what has happened, the virus could spread to catastrophic numbers. Cragin told us he's already had his fifth of the six anthrax inoculation shots. Other than rogue terrorists with bio-tox weapons, we began hearing the running message that China is emerging as our most serious military threat in the world. Visited the National Military Command Center within the Pentagon, better known to movie fans as the highly classified "War Room." Then we headed to Andrews Air Force Base for our first military flight of the week. We flew a KC-10 tanker plane to Norfolk. En route, I went below to the boom operator's compartment and watched an aerial refueling of a C-17 military cargo plane.

Stuff We Did:
After an early breakfast with Naval aviators, we donned "cranials" (small helmets with attached ear protection), goggles and inflatable life vests for a flight to the USS Theodore Roosevelt, a Nimitz-class aircraft carrier conducting flight training operations 100 miles off the North Carolina coast. We were packed into three small CODs ("Carrier Onboard Delivery" aircrafts) -- tightly strapped into our seats in the dark passenger compartment. For those who have never flown on military transports, there are no windows, all of the seats face backwards and everyone uses earplugs because of the high noise level inside the cargo planes. When we approached the ship, the COD made a sharp braking turn -- getting us to about 2-3 G's -- before making a perfect tailhook landing on the 3-wire and having the wire jerk us to a sudden stop on the deck. We toured the massive ship: 19 levels (accessible entirely by stairs and ladders -- no elevators!). The ship can hold a crew of over 6,000 when deployed with a full air wing (but currently had only 3,300 on board). The Captain said the average age the crew of his ship was just 19 years old (think about what tells about the low re-enlistment rate!). At lunch, we ate with enlisted crewmen who told us of life about the ship. Several said they had to wait in line 60-90 minutes just to get into the cafeteria for each meal -- and as long as 2½ hours when they are at full crew -- causing many of them to eat only two meals a day. When we heard that many of these seamen had yet to ever visit much of the ship, we invited some to join our groups for the rest of the tour. A few seamen took us up on the offer -- but most dropped-out when we reached the blue-tiled floors on the upper levels of the ship. One explained that the blue tiles signified "Officers' Country" and -- as an enlisted seaman -- he simply was not allowed to walk there. Watched a series of fighter jet tailhook landings and catapult launches. Suited back up and boarded the CODs for the trip back to Norfolk -- and the amazing cat launch that shoots the COD off the deck (the pilots refer to it as "the E ticket ride at Disney" of flying). The launch violently throws you forward from your seat into the tight four-point seat harness that holds you in place -- and any loose objects (like eyeglasses) go flying towards the back of the plane. Upon our return to Norfolk, we boarded a C-17 cargo plane for the flight to Pope AFB at Fort Bragg, North Carolina. Dinner with the Army commanders at Fort Bragg, followed by an early bedtime.

Stuff We Did:
Breakfast with the Special Forces/Rangers, followed by a briefing from the Commanding General of the US Special Operations Command. The Special Forces (more popularly known as the "Green Berets") and Rangers are the elite fighting forces of the US Army. Viewed jump training in the vertical wind tunnel, followed by presentations from the Ranger Psychological Operations (PSY OPS) units that engage in propaganda warfare tactics. Viewed a live fire, close quarter battle exercise of an urban unit storming and neutralizing a house used by a terrorist cell. On the target firing range, we all got to shoot Beretta 9mm pistols, H+K 9mm rifles and M79 rifles (the standard Army issue combat rifle). Marksmanship awards were given for the best and worst pistol scores (I was neither ... scoring a respectable 83 out of a possible 100 points on my first time ever shooting). Lunch in field kitchens with the troops and Commanding General. Following lunch we participated in a Non-Combatant Evacuation exercise. The 55 of us in JCOC were the non-combatants -- playing American personnel in need of immediate evacuation from a fictitious, post-coup African nation of "Nogoland." We were bused to the "US Embassy" -- with the caravan running a gauntlet of hostile, anti-American mobs before reaching the embassy. Watching from the roof of the embassy compound in an urban combat city, we saw the Special Forces first try to order the mobs away from the compound. When enemy snipers appeared -- followed by more heavy weaponry -- the Special Forces answered with a swift, heavy show of force. After much gun and rocket fire, we were then quickly herded into the all-black Chinook helicopters for a fast, low-flying, wild ride with machine guns blazing to Pope AFB -- where we were handed over to the XVIII Airborne Corps. We were each assigned an "Airborne buddy" -- an 82nd Airborne enlisted man -- who spent the next 90 minutes with us to answer our questions and walk us through the various "static displays" (this term refers to various equipment on display, versus in action). At one static display, we saw a brand new truck-based, rocket launcher that fires six rockets and was "just delivered" by Lockheed. When asked how the launcher is reloaded, a soldier candidly told the group that "it has a built-in arm that is supposed to reload it -- but it doesn't work. The motor burns out when you try to use it ... so we have to bring a second vehicle along that does the reloading." Umm ... can we return it for a refund? Then we loaded onto C-130s with the paratroopers for a static line jump at an altitude of just 800 feet (they jumped, not us ... although I was one of several JCOC folks who asked to be allowed to jump). The C-130s then landed in the drop zone field at dusk and we exited to meet up with the soldiers that had just jumped. After a late dinner at the drop zone, we donned Kevlar combat helmets, waterproof camouflage jackets and night vision goggles and ventured out into the darkened battlefield and stormy, moonless night to view live fire exercises of Airborne troops (with helicopter air support) assaulting a fortified enemy compound. "You folks are out here on a dark, cold, windy, rainy night," General Stan McCrystal told us in the field, "Now you get to see real 'soldiering' conditions." Our day finally drew to a close ... nearly 19 hours after it began.

Stuff We Did:
Early morning flight to Camp Lejeune for our cool, wet day with the Marines. One colonel welcomed us, telling us that we'd each be issued Gore-Tex camouflage jackets that "should keep you pretty dry and warm." Moments later, someone asked Commanding General Marty Berndt if the program would be moved inside today because of the heavy rains. After responding with a withering look of disbelief to that wimpy request, Berndt added: "The colonel told you the coats will keep you dry and warm. Well, they won't! You'll be cold. You'll be wet. That's tough. Suck it up! Get over it!" Well, that ended the whining and -- for the rest of the day -- we stood outside in the wind and rain without umbrellas and without complaining (even as streams of water ran down the inside of our pant legs and pooled in our boots). We saw a beach assault with amphibious vehicles, tanks and assault helicopters -- and an urban riverine assault launched from an inland waterway. From generals down to the young wife of an enlisted man, we heard a constant message about how inadequate the quality of family housing is for the enlisted soldiers at the Camp Lejeune. Observed non-lethal weapon demonstration of Marines performing riot control in a foreign country (truncheons, rubber bullets, pepper spray, shields, etc.). Observed the joint Chemical-Biological Incident Response Force -- which, fortunately, they have not yet been needed for an actual situation. The highlight of the day was the Urban Terrain Exercise in which Marines used ground soldiers, helicopters, tanks and other mechanized weaponry to seize control of a hostile foreign village from enemy troops. It was a high adrenaline, high firepower event. At the end, we had a chance to chat with many of the soldiers. I asked one tank gunner why he joined the Marines and he happily answered: "I get to drive a tank and be the most powerful and efficient killing machine possible." He added that he loves his job, loves blowing things up and -- as an extra bonus -- it also impresses the women he meets. After dinner at the officer's club, we boarded our C-17 and flew to Langley AFB in Virginia.

Stuff We Did:
A day of exercises at Coast Guard Training Center in Yorktown, Virginia. The facility is set amid the historic Revolutionary War battlefield, with old battlefield sites just steps away from some of the Coast Guard buildings. Breakfast with enlisted personnel, then a brief tour of barracks housing. Went out on a small, fast USCG utility boat for a search and rescue mission exercise involving a helicopter and dive jumper. Next were a series of maritime law enforcement exercises involving shooting simulators, live interaction situations, etc. In the simulator, my JCOC cop partner (who was seemingly training for a job with the Philadelphia Police Department) put ten shots into an armed suspect ... and then put six more shots into the unarmed guy who next came onto the scene. We also met with HazMat/Strike Team members, set sail on a Coast Guard buoy tender ship, visited a cutter used in alien interdiction operations and observed exercises with a USCG foreign port security unit. Actually, in that last one, I got to go out on one of the small patrol boats and fire the forward mounted 50-caliber machine gun against an approaching terrorist threat. After a BBQ dinner at the end of the day, it was back onto the C-17 for the flight to Eglin AFB in Florida ... and possibly the first recorded instance of a major pillow fight aboard a military transport. This also proved to be the most lethal day for the JCOC group, as Coast Guard team member Jane Brady actually helped kill a 46-year-old man this morning (note: she's the Attorney General of Delaware and was on the phone early in the morning with the Governor -- as required by state law -- to order that the lethal injection execution of convicted killer David Dawson proceed).

Stuff We Did:
Breakfast with young Air Force officers. The other military branches all joke that the USAF treats its folks better than the other branches in terms of quality of life matters. Example: "In civilian life, you call it a bathroom. In the Marines and Navy, we call it the head. In the Army it's called a latrine. In the Air Force, I think they call it the executive wash room," a Marine general jokingly told us at Camp Lejeune. Living up to their stereotype, a lieutenant tells me he joined the Air Force "because, unlike the Army or Marines, I figured they wouldn't yell at me a lot. It's a lot like working for a corporation, except that I have to put on a uniform before going to work each day." Despite the jokes, these quality of life factors produce benefits for the Air Force: the lieutenant plans to stay in the Air Force after his initial commitment ends next year. We saw a kinda lame F-15 flight demo ... a large part fell off the plane during one of the first stunts, ending the demonstration. It took a half hour before they could find another F-15 to perform some loops and rolls for us without any parts falling off. Met with some pilots from the 33d Fighter Wing and each JCOC'er got to spend ten minutes in the advanced F-15 flight simulators. The "heads-up" instrument display really makes flying easier! I took off and landed safely the first time -- buzzed another F-15 -- then crashed and died on my second landing attempt. We had lunch with some enlisted men. Two sergeants told me that they don't mind being deployed overseas because the Air Force folks are usually housed in hotels while their friends in the Army and Marines usually have to live in tents. We toured the deployment center and watched a base perimeter security exercise. We also visited a hanger saw a static display of various smart bombs and missiles. Afterwards, we had the best dinner of the week: tons of fresh seafood prepared in a variety of ways. Boarded the C-17 for the flight to Peterson AFB, Colorado.

Stuff We Did:
Visited Schriever AFB, outside of Colorado Springs. Schriever is the home of US Space Command and the 50th Space Wing. Signs all over the base warn persons: "Restricted Area. Use of Deadly Force Authorized." Visited the Milstar Mobile Ops squadron, responsible for keeping our military units in communication with each other through our Milstar satellite system in time of nuclear war. In a bit of gallows humor, the squadron logo features a mushroom cloud exploding behind Pike's Peak, with the Milstar trucks in the foreground, the Grim Reaper walking by carrying a suitcase ... and the squadron motto "We’re Outta Here!" Visited a satellite tracking station. Saw the official atomic clock -- the most precise clock in the world. I briefly got to "fly" a NATO satellite (not really ... but they let us enter a command and think we're doing something ... and gave us each a certificate certifying the we got some "stick-time" flying a satellite ... then they came behind us and un-did everything we did and entered it correctly once we were gone). Bus ride to Cheyenne Mountain, the famous underground headquarters of NORAD (North American Air Defense Command). After seeing this facility portrayed in so many Cold War era films, it was a thrill to take the bus ride three-quarters of a mile into the interior of the mountain and then walk through the huge blast doors into the actual complex. Built in the Cold War to withstand a nuclear blast, NORAD officials now readily concede a well-placed modern nuclear missile would flatten the whole mountain -- but they maintain operations here out of convenience. Security is still very high: cell phones, beepers, radios, electronic car keys, etc., are prohibited in the compound. US and Canadian officials share the command of NORAD. The famous missile command war room is located here (with the big computerized map of the world, constantly tracking all missile launches and the location of the key US leaders) -- but is much smaller than it appears in the movies. That night, we had a nice farewell dinner back in town with the NORAD and Space Command folks.

Back at the hotel before the final dinner, I had a lengthy side chat with one top military official who expressed concern over the proposed federal tax cuts: "The [$1.2 billion] tax cut will come from the military [budget]. Where else do people think the cuts will come from? From Social Security or Medicare or education? I don't think so! We're the biggest chunk of discretionary funding ... Service members won't get any pay raises. ... Procurement is a mess. Don't even get me started on that. ... Housing improvements -- which are desperately needed -- look likely to get even less money in the future. The Armed Forces will be the big loser with these tax cuts." Another General offered a somewhat differing view: "No one joined the military to get rich or live in a luxury resort. They joined to serve their country or receive occupational and educational opportunities. We still need to keep focused on the programs that increase our military readiness and efficiency in combat." In the course of this week, I came to acutely understand the level of frustration they both expressed.

I don't think I learned many answers this week ... but I learned a lot of the problems. I came to appreciate -- much more than I did before -- the heroic services performed by the young men and women of our armed forces. We need to pay our service members more and we need to improve military housing. We need serious procurement reform -- and the elimination of needless weapon systems. We need to study why the military is so successful at forging kids into responsible, mature, motivated adults -- while many of our schools vainly struggle to do the same. We need base closures (but no military person wants to state on the record which ones need to be closed). We need to find ways to retain experienced service members. We need to ask ourselves why the US is continuing to build a military designed to fight a two-theater war ... when all week we heard that China, North Korea, rogue states and isolated terrorist cells are our most realistic threats today. Like I said ... lots of problems, but very few easy answers.

A postscript ... One week after returning from JCOC, I was invited to attend a large weekend backyard party in DC at the home of a retired CIA operative. The party attracted a sizable number of past and present spies -- from both sides of the Cold War. While chatting with retired KGB General Oleg Kalugin -- the former KGB head of all Soviet counterintelligence operations -- he nudged me and directed my attention to two young Chinese men in casual clothes talking with some folks about ten yards away. "See those two? They're both with Chinese Intelligence," said Kalugin. "The one on the right is a colonel with Chinese Intelligence." It makes the emerging threat seem pretty close to home.

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